“Searches Are…” A lesson in human intolerance and lack of effort to understand others…

I have a Bing Bar on my computer, and I went to search something and this came up:

I found this to be a shocking/amusing answer, so I decided to have  my own “start a search and see what the results continue as” game. I quickly cleared all by browsing history, and began searching.

At first it was kind of funny, and rather interesting:

Then, I had an idea. I began to wonder what most people searched about more people, and about more serious topics.

Okay, this is kind of funny…

At least the internet doesn’t hate children.

Oh.

Well, we expect celebrities to get hate…

At least Taylor Swift cares not about what people think of her.

Not bad…

Okay, could be worse…

Alright, this is getting kind of…

Alrighty…

It didn’t have anything to say about asexual people, though.

Or bisexual people, or pansexual people, or many other sexualities. I’m not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing.

Then, it really started to get very intolerant. I understand that these results are partially due to how I phrased the question/statement in the search, but the fact that such result options are even around is the fault of no one but the many searchers on the internet.

Wow.

You’d think perhaps it would be something like “white people are from what countries” or something. Nope.

Then I decided to search for religious-themed options. I expected some to be more judgmental than others, but the way that it turned out was worse than expected:

 

This is despicable, and almost makes me want to throw up.

At least we can agree that dentists are liars, but that is beside the point.

Bing Search is a search engine that reveals human intolerance and a lack of effort to understand others, that is what Bing search is.

Or perhaps just closed-minded.

And not willing to look for the right answers to the right questions.

Well now.

If you think people are awesome and crazy, dear internet searchers, then why are you so judgmental?

Stop judging people, and instead be willing to understand them.

Let us be the generation that is willing to learn about people instead of being intolerant of others due to things like judgments about race and religion. We are in college to learn for ourselves, so why not also be willing to learn about others?

Know people before you label people.

Also, make the right searches! If you are searching “jews are disgusting” you are obviously already making a biased search and will therefore be presented with results that simply support this bias. Why not just search “jewish beliefs” or “judaism” instead? Better yet, why don’t you go to the library and read a book by a reliable source, and THEN make your decision?

It makes me sad to see that this is what people decide to search on Bing when asking questions. There are so many better questions to ask about people than the ones that show up as top results.

At CCBC, something I really enjoy is seeing all the friendships and relationships that exist between people of different ages, genders, sexualities, races, religions, and beliefs. In fact, it isn’t even something that I consciously think about very much– because such friendships are often the norm. Sure, the environment at CCBC is not perfectly tolerant, but nowhere is. Perhaps this is indicative of a good step forward in the world.

I don’t believe the world will ever be perfectly tolerant– that would be impossible.

However, let’s all just make an effort to understand others and perhaps the future will be a brighter place.

…and a place where internet searches are full of more curiosity than full of  judgement.

 

 

 

What College Students Probably Do On Snow Days

Sleep In

I think everyone does this; it’s refreshing to have a few extra hours of sleep on such days. My condolences to all of the sleep that was lost for those who accidentally woke up early and could not get back to sleep.

 

Keep Wearing Their Pajamas/Sweatpants

Now, personally I would NEVER do this. Wearing pajamas or sweatpants when you aren’t 1) sleeping or 2) very, very sick feels incredibly gross to me. That being said, I know lots of other people enjoy this for some inexpiable reason, so, good for them.

 

Do Silly Things In The Snow

And probably not wearing proper snow-gear, either. Tsk, tsk. Then they quickly get cold and promptly return to the warmth of their homes.

 

Want Hot Chocolate… But Have None

Nobody ever actually has ingredients for hot chocolate when it snows, do they? Well, I sure don’t. Boooooo.

 

The Internet

Facebook. Tumblr. Pinterest. Maybe some student blogging, if you’re me? Have fun reading about other people who are stuck inside because of the snow, and chatting with other web users who are doing the exact same thing as you.

 

Watch Stuff

I don’t actually watch much TV myself and sadly I don’t have Netflix (if I did, I could re-watch Sherlock again! Yay!) but I know a lot of people use snow days to catch up on the shows that they’ve gotten behind on. Or start new shows– you should all go and watch Sherlock

 

Do Homework

Because some of us had quizzes that were today, and they were postponed! More time to study for them! Maybe some people are also getting other things done that needed to get done… like editing movies…

 

Be Bored

I feel like I’m in The Shining if I stay inside too long during snow days. The glamour of not having to do anything wears off fairly quickly, in my opinion.

 

Go Do Things

This is probably, prooooobably a bad idea. However, staying inside gets tedious, so looks like it’s time to go on an adventure after a day of nothing.

 

What do YOU do on snow days? How accurate was I? 

In Which It Snowed A Heck-Ton

Chapter One: In which I wake up at 8:00 AM and check to see if CCBC is closed

Chapter Two: It is. I knew it.

Chapter Three: In which I do not go immediately back to sleep because I decide to check Facebook

Chapter Four: And I have to cancel Film Society meeting for the day

Chapter Five: In which I get extra sleep

Chapter Six: In which my brothers are outside shoveling snow, my sister is trying to build things out of powdery snow, and my baby sister is inside playing with a box that is full of snow… while wearing snowpants and no shoes

Chapter Seven: In which I plan to go on an adventure today anyway

Chapter Eight: In which the snowplow guy becomes frustrated

Chapter Nine: In which the snowplow guy is still frustrated because he simply cannot get this one bit of slush around the corner

Chapter Ten: He still can’t get it, after four tries…

Chapter Eleven: In which the snowplow guy finally does it!

Chapter Twelve: In which I decide to create a CCBC blog post

Epilogue: This entire story was a bit boring, but nice… just like snow days

 

 

Things To Love About CCBC

In honor of Valentine’s Day, we certainly aren’t going to be talking about mushy stuff. If you want mushy stuff that I have written, go read the end of this post. Instead, we are going to be talking about what we love about CCBC, because sometime it is easy to forget what you appreciate about places that you are always at. 
In no particular order…
  1. Good teachers
  2. The clubs
  3. The fact that the Catonsville campus goes in a circle
  4. Study rooms
  5. …not studying in study rooms
  6. Free food at events
  7. …that isn’t cake with shortening-flavored icing
  8. People who don’t wear Uggs
  9. …people who DO wear Uggs, cause we don’t judge
  10. All the awesome people who work in the Admissions office
  11. also everyone who works in Student Life
  12. Awesome people everywhere, really
  13. “Hidden” areas where you can print for free
  14. When Blackboard actually works
  15. …when it doesn’t, and your assignments get pushed to a later date
  16. Einstein Bros at Catonsville
  17. Frozen hot chocolate
  18. The lovely people who hate it when you order anything frozen
  19. The cafeteria being open later. I guess.
  20. …because cheap pudding
  21. Fliers that are well-designed
  22. …and ones that aren’t
  23. The feeling of being on campus really early in the morning and you’re being productive
  24.  That milkshake machine on the Dundalk campus
  25. …the cafeteria at Dundalk in general; what’s with that?!
  26. The stupid pop music from last year that they play in the Barn during events
  27. Dr.  Kurtinitis speaking
  28. The entertaining people that are at SGA meetings
  29. …and when they have pineapple at SGA meetings
  30. Running into people that you know who you want to talk to
  31. Avoiding people who you know who you don’t want to talk to
  32. PEP students
  33. People who’ve been at CCBC for like, an eternity
  34. Ambassadors
  35. Mentors
  36. …with gorgeous, ridiculously bright shirts
  37. The Awards Banquet
  38. The Honors’ Center
  39. …and how the Honors’ Center smells, because for some reason it smells good
  40. When it’s spring and the grass starts growing in ridiculously green
  41. Shortcuts around campus
  42. Chilling backstage in the ARTS building
  43. The ARTS exhibits they have on campus
  44. The locker rooms. With the giant air-drying machines.
  45. The gym. Especially when it’s completely empty
  46. That one super friendly, awesome woman who works in the cafeteria on the Catonsville campus whose name I have forgotten even though I have known her for years now
  47. Events with dress codes
  48. Events without dress codes for those of you who are into that thing; you style-less goofballs ;)
  49. Outdoor events held on nice days
  50. When class gets out early
  51. When you can talk to your teacher after class
  52. When you don’t have to get textbooks for a class
  53. When you DO have to get textbooks, but they have them in the library
  54. When the bus isn’t late
  55. …or isn’t irritatingly early
  56. People who don’t mind walking everywhere around campus
  57. People who walk at the same pace as you
  58. Classrooms with windows
  59. How lovely it looks when it is snowing on campus
  60. …even when it’s freezing
  61. When it’s freezing, and you get to enter a warm building
  62. Fresh-feeling spring days that smell like grass
  63. Crisp fall days that smell like leaves
  64. The first and last days of semester
  65. Computer labs
  66. The CADD labs, with the professors from CADD
  67. Perfect grades
  68. People who actually have cars
  69. People who think like you do
  70. People who are early for things
  71. The staplers in the Student Life office
  72. Empty classrooms
  73. The windows in the library
  74. The campus shuttle
  75. Student blogs. Haha!
  76. Benches and ledges to step on
  77. Tables to lie on and sit on, like mature adults
  78. The ARTS stage
  79. The [moving?] staircases in HTEC
  80. Giving tours to people who are on time
  81. Couples who aren’t annoying
  82. The Mansion at Catonsville
  83. The bathrooms in the library
  84. That one bathroom in HTEC where there’s one sink with a real sink handle
  85. Gaps between classes– that are longer than five minutes
  86. That one super-cold water fountain in between SSRV and HTEC
  87. Inside jokes within clubs
  88. Reading books for fun in the library
  89. The power of the Student ID
  90. …and people’s adorably atrocious ID photos
  91. Vending machines that don’t steal people’s money
  92. …except for the one in the ARTS building. Don’t even bother with that one.
  93. Workshops for writing and such
  94. “Are you on campus?”
  95. “yes, where are you at?”
  96. When people let you borrow their pens when you lose yours
  97. Or not losing any pens in the first place
  98. The decent-sized desks that do, in fact, exist
  99. When the projectors actually work
  100. The clock tower sculpture thing at Catonsville
  101. The dragon sculpture thing that’s also at Catonsville
  102. The fountain that is ALSO at Catonsville
  103. …and the big windows overlooking the fountain in the Barn Lounge
  104. Fun memories that you don’t know will be fun memories until it’s too late

What are some things that YOU love about CCBC? Comment on this post and they will be added to the list! 

Enter the Film Festival!!

That’s right; it’s that time of year. Time to enter the CCBC Film Festival! Last year’s Film Fest was a big hit, and we hope to make this year’s even more successful!

Check out the FILM FEST TRAILER

Things You Should Know

I am not perfect. I am not an expert on all of humanity. I have no credentials, really, to tell you what you should know or what you should or shouldn’t do. However, in life (and especially during my time at CCBC) I have determined that there are certain things that I feel that everyone should know for their own benefit and for the benefit of their fellow humans, and I have decided to share some of these things with you. I hope that you get something out of this, and consider applying some of these Things You Should Know to your lives.

 

Not Everyone Views “Opening Up” the Same Way

My friend and I have discussed this on numerous occasions, and have arrived at the realization that not everyone sees “opening up” as the same thing. Some people seem to think that if someone tells them something about themselves, it means that they have “opened up” to them and therefore suddenly  value them as a friend.  Now, waaaaaaait a minute here.

You know the people– you meet them, they tell you about a sucky event from their childhood, you respond by saying that a similar thing happened to you– and all of the sudden they think that the two of you are close friends.

In most situations, however, both people involved do not view this the same way. To some people, for example, you “opening up” is telling them something that happened to you, saying your name, age, and major. Then they become massively hurt when they realize that the “friendship” did not matter as much to you as it did to them.

My friend and I decided that if everyone viewed “opening up” the same way, the world would be a whole lot easier. We define opening up as the following:

1. Sharing not only things about yourself, but the REASON behind these things. If they tell you that they have a fear of ketchup, they’re just sharing a fact. If they go into the story BEHIND their fear of ketchup, chances are they are opening up to you.

2. Discussing opinions and reasons for things in general. If they care enough that you know these things about them, they are probably opening up.

The above two definitions do depend, however. Here are other points to remember as well.

1. Observe what they talk to other people about. If they are the kind who USUALLY tell people everything about themselves, them doing the same with you is nothing special. “Opening up” would therefore have to involve much more important things than usual. If, however, they are the type who never even tell people the most insignificant things about themselves, then them sharing something about themselves is more meaningful even if it might not be something as major as the open-book variety of humans.

2. See how THEY view it. If they think of it as a big deal, even if it doesn’t quite seem to be, then they are really opening up. If, however, they seem to just be telling you random things to prove a point, or one-up you, or are being defensive about something– this is certainly not opening up.

 

If You Point Out Something  About Their Face/Body, You Are A Jerk 

“What’s that on your face?” “Why do you have dots on your face?” “You have a scar on your face” “You have marks on your arms” “Your fingers are weird”

OH FOR GOODNESS’ SAKE. Do you THINK that these individuals do not spend a significant part of their lives looking at themselves in the mirror? THEY KNOW about the thing on their face. THEY KNOW. Believe it or not, they totally noticed that about themselves. They know things about their own appearance infinitely better than you ever could. Don’t be a jerk; leave their appearance alone. Some people are really bothered by those blemishes that you rudely pointed out, and chances are they are in fact making an effort to get rid of them. Pointing it out is a d*ck move, man. It helps no one. I really don’t understand why someone would ever rudely point out something about someone that they obviously already know for no reason.

 

Leave Their Major Alone

Why would you give someone a hard time about their choice of major? Them having said major does not hurt anyone; it is their choice and it is significant that they are in college putting effort towards this choice of major in the first place. When people ask me my major, I prepare for a well-rehearsed winning defense because many people are so overly critical about such things. To some, this can be very annoying. To others, it can really hurt their confidence.

It is THEIR life. Let them do with it what they want. All the power to them for studying whatever it is that they are interested in.

 

Learn to Give An Answer, and Mean It

There are some people who say yes too much, and some people who say no too much. Then there are some people who say that they will think about it, but really they mean no. And then we’ve got everyone’s favorite, the people who just don’t answer at all. And then everyone’s REAL favorite, the ones who lie and say they will when they won’t, or vice-versa.

Learn to give an answer, and mean it. If you don’t want to do something, then don’t do it– but DO NOT allow the asker to think that you intend to do it. I don’t care how you go about it, but give an answer and stick to it. People will think that you are lazy, cowardly, rude, or other unfortunately applicable descriptive words in reaction, and you will lose your credibility.

 

Don’t Be Afraid to Talk To People

“But he’s too good to be friends with me” “Why would she ever wanna talk to me?” “she’s so out of my league” “But I’ll just annoy him”

No. This is college; this is not a Teen Nick show. In college, anyone can be friends with anyone. Just look around campus and you will see.

Don’t be afraid to talk to people– just go and talk to them, and do this as soon as possible. Why? Because this is Community College, and soon enough they are going to leave and you’ll be sad that you missed out on a chance to connect with them on some level. It does not matter how cool or intimidating you or your friends think that this person is; make an effort to talk to them if only to not regret your silence later. At best, you become friends with them or start a relationship with them. At worst, they get annoyed with you and you are no worse off than you were before when you never talked to them at all. In fact, chances are you are better off– now you do not have to live life wondering what might’ve happened if you’d decided to simply talk to them.

Go ahead and say hi to them after class. Send them a Facebook message or a text WITHOUT finding a set reason to talk to them, and just see what happens if only to just see what happens.

 

Remember To Say Hello And Good-Bye

You know what hurts? When someone takes off without saying good-bye. It makes one feel insignificant, used, and downright hurt. People do not like to feel insignificant, used, and downright hurt. If you make them feel like this, you are being thoughtless or oblivious, and that is unfortunate. Make an effort to say good-bye to people, whether you were hanging out with them or just swinging by to pick up a book that you lent them. Even if you are in a hurry, a quick wave and a smile will suffice– make an effort to be polite. On the other side, say hi to people. It will show that you are friendly and approachable, and it will make the other people feel recognized.

 

Say The Thing

If you were a book character or movie character, and you were watching yourself as this character, would you want you to say the thing?

Yes. You would. You’d probably get irritated or disappointed with the writers if the thing wasn’t said.

Well guess what? You choose your lines in your life story. Take advantage of the fact that you have the ability to say the thing.

People fear telling people things because they fret over potential reactions. Then they regret not saying what they wanted to say in the long run.

Just say the thing.

Now, I’m not talking in-the-moment, rush of emotion, not thought out random outbursts that you will regret later. I am referring to the thing that you have been wanting to say for quite a while, but never had the courage or will to.

You want to tell your friend that they are awesome? Say it. You want to tell that person that you have feelings for them? Say it. Do you appreciate that they helped you with something? Say so. Do they do something that bothers you? Say that, too.

Now, I suggest not being rude or inappropriate about it. CERTAINLY make an effort not to be creepy. But know that it will feel better once you say the thing. And guess what? It’s probably better for them that you said it, as well. Do not allow unsaid words to weigh down your very being; the ghosts of missed chances and the sinking feelings of “what ifs” to haunt your memory.

 

 Don’t Act Like You Are Better Than Everyone

Unless you are Sherlock Holmes, acting like you are better than everyone automatically makes you despicable in most people’s eyes. I’m not saying that you should not be confident; I am saying don’t be unbearably arrogant in a rude manner. I’m also not saying that you can’t be fake-arrogant– It’s okay to jokingly answer “because I’m awesome” to questions about yourself and so-on. It is not okay to do so in a condescending manner, however.

Oftentimes, arrogant people have nothing to be arrogant about. They act like they are better than everyone, but have nothing really admirable about them. This likely stems from inner feelings of lack of worth, or an exaggerated ego, or both. If this may be you, make an effort to be humble. Hone some skills, and show them off by example when it is necessary to do so; not by being arrogant about them. Nobody likes someone who thinks that they are better than everyone, but obviously is not. A little humility goes a long way– and hey, if you act like a decent human being, chances are you will become what you really yearned to be.

If you actually ARE better than everyone (or think that you are, in your head) this is perfectly fine. You are probably awesome as heck. However, don’t behave like you are better than everyone, because people will become annoyed with your sense of entitlement and self-importance, even if it is warranted. Make an effort to be the type of person that others enjoy being around, because they feel just as amazing as you are when they are around you. If you are unbearably arrogant, you will lose credibility even if it you deserve it for other reasons. Let people decide that you are awesome on their own terms; don’t shove it in their faces.

No one enjoys spending time with someone that they feel rotten around; no one has fun with people who do nothing but infuriate them.

 

Remember That Your Problems Are Your Problems

Some people make everything about themselves, and then they turn around and make their problems YOUR problems. You may be guilty of this, and not even know it. Many people who behave like this are lonely and want attention, and so they try to make their problems become your problems to “test if you care” about them. These people are not looking for advice, and if you attempt to give them some they will likely become defensive and resistant to accepting it. All they want is you to give them a pity-party, because it makes them feel good to be “cared about.” Really, it can be draining for the people that they know, and does nothing to help either of you. Worse, if you decide to humor these people just a few times, they will decide that you can be their go-to for feelings of temporary happiness and can then guilt you into acknowledging them over and over. They may try to make you feel like you are not a good friend if you don’t baby them, or make you feel like if you do not listen to them, they will do something drastic.

Please, try not to be this person. It is not healthy for either party to be involved in this. If you behave like this, you will find difficulty creating friendships and you may trap the other person in a situation they do not want to be involved in. If you really want attention, just try to be a friend. Friendships should not be all about one person taking, taking, taking and never offering anything in return. If you have a problem, OWN the problem and address it thus. If you need help, try asking for genuine advice instead of looking for sympathy. If you are feeling bad about yourself, consider going to a counselor instead of looking to other people for temporary happiness. Simply remember that your problems are your problems, and therefore it is your responsibility to handle them or seek help handling them– don’t drop them on other people.

 

Love At First Sight Does Not Exist

…nononononono don’t x-out this tab now. Hear me out. Also, please note that this is my personal opinion, and you are obviously free to accept it or dis it accordingly.

Love is not what most people think that it is. People confuse love with feelings of attraction– and these are not the same things.

When one experiences “love at first sight,” what they are really experiencing is attraction at first sight. Sure, it may seem adorable when your friend says that they’ve loved that guy/girl they like since “the moment they laid eyes on them,”  but this completely and utterly impossible.

Why?

Because love takes time to develop. Love is not something that can happen at first sight, because in order to love a person, you have to know a person enough to be able to accept them. You must be able to see a person clearly, with all of their strengths and all of their weaknesses, all of their flaws and all of their greatness– view a whole person who is a person just like you are– and see how they are and like them anyway. Love is when you would care about a person even if you did not find them physically attractive; when you would be content simply spending time with them even if they did not want to start a relationship with you. When you care about THEM and not only about a craving for what you feel when you are around them. You love them as a person, and you are not using them to fill empty parts of you. You feel that your life is better with them in it, but they are not your entire life.

You cannot love someone at first sight, because it takes more than one look to know what you really think and feel about someone. Love at first sight? More like lust.

When you think that you are experiencing “love at first sight,” you are actually experiencing attraction at first sight. Just because you are attracted to someone does not mean that you love them. Now, sometimes, one can experience attraction at first sight and go on to create a successful relationship with them anyway– and that’s okay. It’s certainly possible to fall in love with someone that you were initially only attracted to (although do remember that it all started because, being a human with inclinations for attraction to good genes due to the fact that humans are supposed to reproduce, you became attracted to nothing more than the fact that they by chance ended up born to be a good-looking person). More commonly, though, one will catch a bad case of infatuation.

Infatuation is not love. It is commonly mistaken for love, but it isn’t. Infatuation is commonly based on attraction to the other person’s appearance, but can also arise due to attraction to the person as an individual. Unlike with love, however, infatuation can be harmful and tends to end badly. When one is infatuated, they WANT a person because they like how the person makes them feel inside. They use the person to fill the holes in their being that they should be working on themselves. They crave the person, and put them on a pedestal because they are unable to really view them as a person. They see the person  how they want to see them, and see the situation how they want to see it. They can’t love the person, because they are not seeing the person for how they really are. Infatuation is not about the “object of your desire”– it is all about you. When someone starts a relationship based on infatuation, the initial good-feeling obsession will eventually fade and the person will be left with someone who they never loved– they loved the idea of. They might realize that they only got with this person because of feelings of lust, and/or feelings of “wow, this attractive person wants to be with ME? Yay!” and then be able to see the person for who they really are. When you “fall” for an idea of someone, you may be in for a surprise when you discover that they are not how you dreamed that they were.

People who are infatuated tend to convince themselves that it is love. They convince themselves that if they work at it, a relationship with the person that they are obsessed with can work out. That they can “fix” the person and that the person is still the one that they “love,” intentionally overlooking what could be problematic, or that if they bend over backwards for the person, everything will work out. They become desperate, desperate to do anything to HAVE that person. This isn’t love. One must remember that if they make a person the center of their life, they have to be careful not to lose any semblance of a life to put them at the center of.

Would you still “love” them if they didn’t look the way that they do? Would you want to have a family  with them? Grow old with them? Would you still care about them if you didn’t have feelings for them? If they didn’t want to be with you, would you still want to be friends with them? Or would you get angry because you want THEM and not their companionship? Do you like them, or do you want to mold them to be a person who you like?

It isn’t wrong to be attracted to someone. However, if attraction becomes a life-ruining obsession, there is something amiss. Look for a meaningful relationship with a person that you actually see as an individual, accept for how they are, and love them anyway. You cannot recognize love without learning to accept a person– therefore, love at first sight does not exist. And you know what? I think that’s beautiful.

 

What CCBC Club Should You Actually Be In?

Take this quiz to find out what CCBC Club you should be a part of this semester. Sadly, it does not include EVERY club on campus, but it is still a fun quiz!

The new semester is about to start!

HOW, may I ask, did winter break go by so fast?! So many things happened to me this break. Fun things, sad things, random adventures, and the learning of life skills. No, I shall not elaborate. Ask me in person about my winter break.

How was YOUR winter break?! Are you ready for Spring Semester?! I hope so!

Enjoy Your Winter Break!

I have a friend who dislikes the word “enjoy.” What the actual heck, what’s wrong with the word “enjoy?” It’s quicker than saying “have fun during your winter break, people!” but okay.

HAVE FUN DURING YOUR WINTER BREAK, PEOPLE!

Have you registered for classes yet? I sure haven’t. I can’t even wrap my head around the fact that THIS semester ended, let alone that I don’t have much more than a month before the NEXT semester begins!

It’s winter break, so my blog is closed for the winter. I’ll be back again in the spring, though!

 

Stuff That I Learned As New President of Film Society

I seriously learned a lot this semester. As a person who’s always ended up in charge of everything ever, a  life-long big sister, and a martial arts instructor,  Ihadsoooooort of thought that I’d had the whole leadership thing relatively figured out. Well, I was wrong. You never stop learning about anything ever, and even if you think you still have more to learn chances are that you have even MORE to learn than you thought you did.

Last semester, I really loved Film Society because I WASN’T charge of it. It was super cool to just be a member for once in my life, and the previous president was actually highly competent (which is something I’d not found in any other group I’d ever been in).

This semester, though, I had to love Film Society while I was the president and find a good behavior balance. There was no more sitting in the back of the room for me!

Here are some of the things that I learned this semester at Film Society– about life, leadership, humans,  stuff, and responsibility. And more. Etc. Yes.

LEADERSHIP

  • There is actually such a thing as being TOO on-the-ball about things
  • As president, you should always accept  responsibility even if it wasn’t your fault– because it actually IS your fault
  • Don’t ever blame anyone else, ever
  • You actually should care if people like you or not, in this scenario. Be likable.
  • Sometimes you have to sacrifice overall productivity for group contentment
  • The words “humor me” are really powerful
  • Not everything has to be presented as “your” idea
  • Shut up; you don’t  need to take credit for everything, geez
  • It’s better to talk less. And slower.
  • Try to behave in a way that you will never have to defend yourself in the first place
  • If you have to explain yourself, don’t be defensive– make it matter-of-fact
  • You actually CAN do everything– but do it in a way that isn’t taking on other people’s responsibilities directly
  • No one likes being told to meet up or get something done; instead present it in a way that it is something that they are compelled to do instead of obligated to do
  • Nobody reads long Facebook messages
  • Nobody responds to anything but the NEWEST Facebook message
  • Be careful when you’re joking; people take you seriously and may not understand that you’re kidding at times
  • There are certain things you  can’t talk about to the club members and you must only talk about with other leaders
  • Never let the club members know if you’re sad, angry, or uncomfortable– always present yourself in a way that allows the club to be a place for people to escape their problems instead of be met with yours
  • You cannot be a president and a  peer at the same time; you just can’t. So don’t try to be
  • Show that you are competent by being competent, repeatedly
  • Sometimes it’s best to stop mistakes from happening before they happen
  • Sometimes it’s best to allow people to make mistakes– don’t feel guilty about this
  • You’re not perfect, but try to be perfect anyway
  • Recognize when to be direct, and when to be subtle– both are important
  • Sometimes it’s better to apologize later than to ask for permission

PEOPLE

  • Don’t always assume everything is good with those who know you just because they haven’t complained
  • Ask how people are doing, and mean it
  • You can’t please everyone, but behave in a way that aims to without being too concerned about it
  • Always assume that there is going to be someone mad at you, and without being overly-worried about it address the situation indirectly and if that does not work, address it directly but not  brashly
  • Don’t wait for new members to speak up; invite them to participate
  • When people sit off to the side, they are automatically alienated. Don’t let people be alienated
  • Let people get to the point themselves instead of giving them the point immediately. It takes  longer but it works better
  • It’s quicker to do everything yourself, but smarter to include others even in minor ways
  • Work harder to give genuine compliments, for God’s sake!
  • You have to flat-out tell people that they are included or they won’t know at all
  • As a president, you can’t dislike any club members. Ever
  • Sometimes the  best way for people to learn to “swim”  is to throw them in the water
  • Sometimes you have to coach people through things, but not in a way that they feel they are being instructed
  • Don’t tell; suggest
  • Don’t assume that someone knows how to do something; they probably don’t. However, behave as if you believe that they do because sometimes, they MIGHT know how  to do something
  • People can surprise you or  dissapoint you; be realistic and don’t lean too far towards pessimism or optimism
  • Sometimes you talk down to people while leading something; try NOT to do this
  • Don’t tell people to trust you; be the type of person that people can trust
  • It’s okay to let people do things that you know that you could do yourself; remember that this is how you learned to do things in the first place
  • Sometimes you have to nag people and push people to get things done, but never allow them to feel like they are being nagged or pushed or else they won’t want to do it anymore
  • Always say hi to people if you see them around outside of club time
  • It hurts really  badly when people take off without saying goodbye. Don’t do this to other people
  • When Facebook messaging or texting, try to match people’s writing style

FRIENDS

  • Keep friendship separate from  president-club member and president-council-member relationships; again; you can’t be a peer and a president at the same time
  • It’s actually okay to get attached to people; it does not mean that you are not capable alone
  • Let people know that you appreciate them even if it’s difficult to do so
  • You might end up becoming friends with someone that you would’ve never expected to like as a person
  • Just because they are your friend does NOT always mean that you can trust them. If you do trust them, though, make sure they know it. If you don’t trust them, don’t tell them that you don’t trust  them but don’t lie and say that you do– instead, attempt to build mutual trust
  • Trustworthy people are, well, trustworthy; always be  skeptical in general, but  know that sometimes it’s okay to NOT be skeptical
  • Even the best humans are still humans with feelings, egos, and issues; don’t forget this
  • People will ask you for advice. Give advice from a practical standpoint and tell them to look outside of an emotional standpoint for optimal help– but GIVE advice, don’t TELL them what to do
  • Know that you’re going to miss people and enjoy the time that you can spend with them while you can. If not, you’re going to regret it
RUNNING A CLUB MEETING
  • Everyone loves when there’s food around
  • Speaking of food, granola bars  are surprisingly the most popular snack. Although this isn’t surprising, when you think about it from a practical standpoint
  • Don’t bring drinks because then there will be cups everywhere. Everywhere.
  • Adjust the chairs in a way that the seating does not exclude anyone
  • Always introduce yourself and others
  • Don’t stand behind the podium or behind the computer; try and be in the front
  • It’s okay to mingle, but don’t get off topic
  • Make sure you let the other council members get chances to participate in the running of the club meeting
  • Make sure that everything is sorted out
  • If it seems like it’s going to go wrong, it probably is
  • Try to spend time with people after and before the meeting if possible
TECHNICAL STUFF
  • Charge the club camera’s battery. Always.
  • Nobody ever picks up the club camera correctly. Watch it like a hawk
  • Literally everyone wants to play with the equipment. Dear me, watch it like a hawk
  • The microphone starts making ungodly noises if it’s twisted up too far; make sure it isn’t twisted up too far
  • Don’t ever forget to adjust the focus on the camera
  • People will always argue about where to set the ISO and aperture if you let them see what it looks like
  • Some people will say that they don’t want to learn how to do something because they fear failure; try and teach them anyway
  • Don’t rely on the best people to always be available; you have to allow new people to get their chances
  • Premiere is lying when it is  saying that your display drivers are incompatible! LYING, I say!
  • When someone insists that they know how to use the equipment when it is their first time, this does NOT mean that they are all set
  • Keep zooming to a minimum! PLEASE!
  • Makes sure the boom pole is being held at the correct angle
  • When editing, edit as if you are attempting to make the film as short as possible and then the pacing will turn out amazing automatically
  • Color correction and brightness/contrast and  vibrance  and all of that– pick and choose, and do so carefully. Then from there, find the simplest way to make the footage look the best
  • Stop feeling guilty about asking people who know resources where to find resources– just do not be annoying about it

MAKING A MOVIE

  • If it’s a movie meant to be filmed during club time, make sure that it is of a length that can be completed during club time
  • Scene whatever, take whatever– super important to say
  • You don’t always have to film everything in chronological order
  • Make sure you are aware of what actors are there and what actors are not there
  • Write the script to cater the club; don’t write a script and have the club fit to  it
  • Sometimes you have to cut things for time purposes; this is okay
  • Never let things get too far off-track
  • Practice scenes before you shoot them
  • Do multiple  takes even if the scene seems perfect
  • Never assume that you will have the ideal equipment and people present
  • People will think that they are excluded unless you tell them that they are not
  • Everyone thinks that it is easier that it actually is; allow them to experience how it actually is instead of just telling them
  • Nobody understands what goes into editing except for other editors; don’t sweat it if they don’t recognize theimportance butif you get the chance to show them, do so
  • Not having a set director, assistant director, or camera guy never goes well, ever

TIME MANAGEMENT

  • It’s easy to put the club ahead of other things in life. Remember that you are going to college because you are a college student, first and foremost
  • Do your schoolwork before you do your club stuff, for the sake of goodness. You might die otherwise
  • Understand that other people have schoolwork commitments as well
  • Give yourself set dates to get things done
  • Give other people set dates to get things done
  • Always remember that you have a limited amount of time within club-time to get things done; do not lose track of this time
  • No one is ever free at the same time, like, ever. If you can get it done within club time, then get it done within club time